Furries and Gift Certificates

I went to Pittsburgh on Wednesday to get some more work on my sleeve. Don McDonald made the sleeve for me sometime around y2k. When he finished it off with the hand we decided that the arm could use some re-working and updating.
While Don was working and we were talking, he happened to mention that the furries were in Pittsburgh recently for a very large gathering. He had driven by shortly after it had let out and had the surreal experience of seeing half-dressed furries walking down the street carrying their heads – or carrying their entire outfit as they exited the gathering.

It brought me back to a couple of back in the day stories.

The first was that long before I had any idea what the furries were about – some friends and I used to attend the local fetish events in Rochester. There would be the expected sea of leather and corsets and bondage gear… and there was always one lone pink bunny. At the time I had figured that it was just some smart-ass who liked to go to the events and remain anonymous and he (for some reason I had always assumed it was a guy in the pink bunny suit) could watch the fetish goings-on without fear of anyone ever finding out who he was.
I now figure that he was the loan furry participant at the gatherings and I feel sad that there was never another one there for him.

That reminded me of the story about the fetish gift certificates.

You see, every year I used to donate a gift certificate to the Rochester Kink Society for their auction. It was for a large dollar amount (I think $500)  and could only be redeemed for a fetish themed tattoo. This helped them raise money and got me some fun projects that would look good in my portfolio.
So when Carl was hosting a fetish ball and asked me if he could have a donation for a door prize, I figured I would do the same thing.

Same Gift Certificate. Same Parameters. Good for one Fetish Themed Tattoo.

In walks the guy with the gift certificate.

I won this gift certificate and I would like to set up an appointment to have the tattoo done.

Great! What’s your fetish?

What?

The Gift Certificate is for a fetish themed tattoo. What kind of fetish do you want?

What’s a fetish.

Excuse me? You know, a fetish. Bondage? Feet? Adult babies? What is your thing?

I don’t know what you mean.

You know a fetish. Like where you got the gift certificate at the FETISH ball….

Well, I didn’t actually win the Gift Certificate – my friend did and he gave it to me because he doesn’t want a tattoo.

I guess you should go back and ask your friend about fetishes and figure out what you would like to have tattooed, because the gift certificate is only good for a fetish tattoo.

But I’m here now and I want to set up the appointment to have the tattoo done.

I can’t set up and appointment for you without knowing what the tattoo is going to be. I need to know what, where and how big so that I can draw the design and book enough time to finish the tattoo.

Can you help me figure out what to get?

Sure. Here are some books and magazines (gave him a couple of Doris Klostner type books and some bondage magazines) look through them and it will give you a better idea of what a fetish is and what you might want to get done.

*** long time while I am doing other stuff and the guy looks through the reference***

I found something.

Cool. What did you find?

Well here, in this picture, this guy here… I really like the design on the shirt that he is wearing.

That’s a Tribal design.

Yes, that’s nice. I would like to get that.

You are more than welcome to book an appointment to get that done, but the gift certificate will not apply to the tattoo as that is not a fetish themed tattoo.

At this point the guy becomes frustrated and agitated and tells me that I told him if he found something in the magazines that he liked that – that he could get that done. He found something. He wants to have it done.

I try to remain nice and pleasant and calm. I understand he is frustrated and disappointed, he is looking for a free tattoo and he is obviously completely confused as to what is going on.

No, I’m sorry. Tribal doesn’t count. It has to be a fetish. Something that does it for you. Something that turns you on.

Well, I do have a thing for me car.

Perfect. Bring me a picture of you fucking your car and I will put that on you.

YOU ARE DISGUSTING!!! and out the door he went.

I still feel badly. I am sure that I greatly offended him and I am sure that he had a very interesting conversation with the guy who gave him the gift certificate. I learned my lesson and only donate those type of things to AUCTIONS were the people bidding on it know the parameters ahead of time. I will never give one away as a door prize again.

Remember boys and girls,

You Can’t Make This Shit Up.

 

 

~ by justteejay on March 12, 2011.

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